


Standing on the Edge

by JustAPassingGlance



Category: Glee
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-24
Updated: 2016-04-24
Packaged: 2018-06-04 06:32:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 698
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6645235
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JustAPassingGlance/pseuds/JustAPassingGlance
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>And there they were, once more at the edge of a cliff, staring at each other and wondering if either of them was ready to take the plunge. He had lost track of how many times they had been there before. How many times they had looked out into the abyss of their future and backed away from the ledge.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Standing on the Edge

**Author's Note:**

> written for seblaineaffairs spring fling.  
> for the quote "If we wait until we’re ready, we’ll be waiting for the rest of our lives."

And there they were, once more at the edge of a cliff, staring at each other and wondering if either of them was ready to take the plunge. He had lost track of how many times they had been there before. How many times they had looked out into the abyss of their future and backed away from the ledge.

Maybe they were ready, him and Blaine. Maybe this was finally their time. Nothing else was really in the way—no other boyfriends or husbands, no pressures from school. Kids had happened, or hadn’t, according to plan and were now almost old enough for kids of their own.

There was a potential move on the horizon, but nothing had been solidified yet. Sebastian didn’t need it, he was content enough in his current job and on track for a promotion. The only real reason to consider it was as a way to ease the restlessness that was once again beginning to stir within him.

But maybe moving across the country wasn’t the only way to soothe it.

Maybe adventures could happen just as easily in his own backyard.

Maybe _he_ was ready.

“It’s starting to feel like we’re always just waiting,” Blaine broke the heavy silence. Sebastian raised his eyes from the spot they had been studying on the floor to meet Blaine’s.

And that wasn’t entirely true. Not really. Not _always_. Sometimes it had felt like waiting and sometimes it hadn’t. There had been years when they didn’t talk and years when they hardly saw each other. He might have spared a thought every now and then but they just hadn’t been part of each other’s lives.

And then there had been months when they counted down the days until they saw each other. Days when he hadn’t been able to think of anyone else. The hours upon hours where they savored every inch of each other and reveled in their togetherness.

Twenty-nine years of the in-between. Fifteen years of the ebb and flow of the promise that it would be the last time because what they were doing maybe wasn’t “emotionally healthy” (Blaine’s words, not his but the sentiment he supposed he understood) for either of them.

Maybe it was what was holding them back from all the happiness that was out there.

Maybe it wasn’t love. Maybe it was just an addiction.

And who would have ever guessed that Blaine Anderson would have been the one thing in his life that he couldn’t quit?

“What’s wrong with waiting?” He could see in Blaine’s eyes a fear that he knew was echoed in his own.

And what was wrong with it? After all, it had been working for them for years.

Wasn’t there time together, no matter how long or short it lasted, all the better for the time they spent apart? Didn’t they just take for themselves all the best parts of being in a relationship and discard all the worst? One of them always leaving before things got too sour.

And maybe the fact that they hadn’t ever made it work was because they couldn’t. They couldn’t weather the storms. A real relationship wouldn’t be able to survive. They would explode apart the moment sailing wasn’t so smooth.

Neither of them did adjustment well, although Blaine like to pretend like he did. He acted like he could fit in with anyone and adjust to any situation. And sometimes his acting was so good that it became true, the he did adjust and everything was fine.

But Sebastian didn’t want any part of their life together to just be an act. He was selfish and we wanted every moment to be real.

Therein lay his problem. He didn’t know how to do real. Not when it came to his personal life. He could lie to men to get them into his bed and lie some more to keep them there. He could play at being a boyfriend, knowing that sooner or later the charade would come to an end. Even when it started off honest, the lies always came.

Blaine’s toe tapped once, twice on the floor.

“Maybe nothing,” he said. “Nothing’s wrong with waiting.”

 


End file.
